Wednesday, December 27, 2006

The One...

Lovable (cant help it),Good looking (can help it),Unpredictable (most of the time), Extremist(dont believe in shades of gray, its either black or white for me), Creative (was born that way), Sarcastic (all the time), Impulsive, moody (no, dont suffer from any split personality disorders), Passionate (about everything I do), Intelligent (so says everyone), Philosophical (not sentimental), nice person (deep down inside; warning-will have to dig really deep(not really)), Humorous (if you can understand my jokes), Workaholic (cant live without feeling productive), Ambitious (with a never say die attitude), love icecreams/movies/stimulating conversations/traveling/bathing, cannot suffer fools, selfish (self comes first!(again not really)), cynical, yet sane ; capricious, yet stable; spur-of-the-moment with a backup plan, stereotype unique and the perfect paradox. When you think you know me, you don`t, when you think you don`t you do. Passionate about work, Passionate about fun, passionate about life!

Monday, December 25, 2006

The Search..

Hmmm...there's lot to write, yet nothing much to write home
about. Precisely the kind of dilemma you're in when you sit
down to describe yourself, in right earnest - you're all of
it, and yet none of it. So who's the real me?
My life has taken me to myriad places, people,
circumstances and emotions, and looking back, I feel that a
common thread runs through it all - Life has been
beautiful, and i'm in love with it. So much so that,
sometimes i'm confused as to who's the real me - the one
who likes to lie alone on the terrace gazing the sky at
nights, or the one who likes to sweat it out at the
dancefloor with pals, the one who feels unbounded joy on an
achievement, or the one who wipes his lonely tears in a
dark room. All through this and lot more, Life has been
indeed beautiful. It still is, thanks to it's serendipity.
Or is it that i'm a die-hard romantic? Did I just mention
romance? Well, thats one emotion which is missing from my
diary. Sometimes, when my solitude; crowded as it is by
events and relationships; gets too heavy to bear, I ask God
that when he gave me the pining for love, I realised I had
a heart, and now that it aches, where's love? As expected,
I get only silences in return, but my life has taught me
that silences have the profoundest of meanings hidden in
them, and so I'm still trying to unravel it.
.......This self-description seems spinning out of control,
I almost sound apologetic about the lack of love, but then
I look out of my window - its 4 a.m. and everybody around
is asleep, the sky is changing hues very slowly, the cool
breeze gives me the goosebumps, the sleepy eyes are opening
wide to the enchantment of the hour, and then a voice of
the Muezzin calling out to all the faithful for prayer,
echoes in the skies, like a manna from the heaven it
descends to me. The prayer, though I can't comprehend a
word of it, passes through my soul, and it rises again,
carrying the weight of my hopes & desires. There she goes....and I say a mute AMEN! I look around, its a brand new day - the first day of the rest of my life - and I'm in love - with LIFE. La vita e bella.
What am I looking for? Hmmmmm, someone who can make sense of the aforesaid goulash :)).
But seriously, someone who can talk, can be talked to, someone who too is straight from the heart.......

Sunday, December 24, 2006

The Desire..

Take a good look around you..u’ll find a lot that u have..u’ll find a lot that u don’t have..u’ll find a lot that u want..
This wanting can be dangerous…u might ask…why ? well..its really very simple..
U want a lot of things…some u get..some u don’t…some r explicit…some implicit..whereas some r just plain hidden…its hidden inside-the truth known only to u..
But tell me something ?? u know u have it but others don’t know that u do..so is ur desire fulfilled..?? or is it that the very fact that others know that u have wat u want leads to the fulfillment of ur desire ?? interesting isn’t it ..how our mind plays tricks on us…u keep telling urself..its not for them…but u know wat ?? its always for them…every single thing that u do..that u want…is not for urself…its for them..! u might disagree…well..so did i…but like I said already..things change..
The desire to grow..the desire to believe..the desire to accept…no one thinks abt these…
I mean why is it that we want something so badly but once we have it we don’t appreciate it as we used to ?? is it human nature ?? or is it u or me ??
This desire puts u in a trap…it engulfs u…doenst let u go…it’s the only thing on ur mind when it really shouldn’t be…n the worst part-- there is nothing u can do abt it..(sometimes there is..) but just let urself get enthralled by it….sucks doesn’t it ?!
I mean there r these times when u feel that WHY ?? but then those moments r very short-lived..they disappear as quickly as they appear..i wish they’d stay for a longer time..
But one has to got to live with it..cuz without the desire..there would be nothing..u wouldn’t long for nething n that wouldn’t give u the drive to do things that u do..so really desire is a good thing ???
Decide for urself..

Saturday, December 23, 2006

How Things Change..

Have you ever wondered how things change ??
I have..for a long long time..This phrase just astonishes me..
Things really change..
they change for the good..they change for the bad..But they change...It is no more of a question than an exclaimation..I am not asking how things change..
i am just reflecting on the fact that they do..
There comes a time in everyone's life when you think that this is the thing that you want..
this is wat is gonna make you happy..and your pretty sure of it..but wat if it is not ???
Wat do you do ?? do you run away or do you go ahead neway ??   
The answer to this very question leads you on a journey
that can be quite memorable as it can be painful..
Things change..ppl change...their perspective changes...situation changes..and all of these are interrelated..one cannot live on its own...
At one point of time..you'd have never imagined your life to be like this but then you wake up one morning n you find your life to be in the exact scenario that you were tryin to avoid....cruel isnt it ??
Wat do you do then ?? Nothing...Just accept things and move on....why ? for your survival...for your existence in a social world...for your presence to be appreciated...for your very purpose of fulfilling the promises that you once made...
things change...
but then there is nothing that one can do abt it..or can they ?? but to change something that has already changed..u'll have to change something else...is it all worth it ?? that's another word that really plays tricks on ur mind..."worth"...its laughable really...think abt it..! yes..i mean u !
see..how things change...i'v started writing "u" instead of "you" !
like i said earlier...its funny..painful but still funny..........